If you are ready for the whole thing to be 'settled' . . .

All of us have had conversations over the last couple of weeks that sound something like this:

"I'm done with this whole election.  Can we just get it over with  . . ."

Usually (in some form) punctuated with the following:

"I just want this whole thing to be over and feel settled."

Settled?  

Excuse me, did you say, 'settled?'

We are already settled.  It is an illusion to think that anything is unsettled.  Nothing is going to change November 9th.  

This is a short list of things that have already been settled:

* Regardless of how we feel about it or who becomes president, no wall will be built on our border.  We already have a wall at our border with Mexico.  Really.  This will be front page news.

* Regardless of how we feel about it or who becomes president, there will still be one half of one percent of our nation that believes they are a different gender and will use whatever bathroom they want.

* Regardless of how we feel about it or who becomes president, no amount of tax "on the rich" will put a dent in our economic woes.  If we taxed the richest 1% of our country 100% this year it would not be enough to fund medicare for three years . . . and that is just one of thousands of government programs.  A drop in the ocean.

* Regardless of how we feel about it or who becomes president, Roe vs. Wade will not be overturned.  We have had 20 years of Republican presidents since 1973 who were a whole lot more popular and effective  - they even appointed justices and that didn't get it done.  Speaking of justices . . . six of nine justices ruling in Roe v Wade were from Republican presidents.  Supreme Court appointees don't mean much.

* Regardless of how we feel about it or who becomes president, no one is going to make a law making it illegal to buy a gun.  

* Regardless of how we feel about it or who becomes president, people will still be able to pray, go to church and say what they want to say.  Even boneheads.

* Regardless of how we feel about it or who becomes president, Russia will still do crazy things in the world, Iran and North Korea will continue to be wildcards and no one will have a clue how to deal with it all.

* Regardless of how we feel about it or who becomes president, there will still be evil in people's hearts that make them go into public places and kill other people with guns or knives or explosives.

That's because what we are experiencing is a human condition - not a political one.  And you don't have to be religious to realize that we struggle with spiritual issues, not legislative issues.  The world is remade from daily decisions to do the right thing, not pieces of paper that tell us to do the legal thing.  

You want to feel more settled?

Flip it upside down . . .

The Bible never said 'make laws, influence public policy, stuff the Supreme Court and the Kingdom of Heaven will come . . ."

You know where the Kingdom of Heaven resides?  Inside of you.  So I don't care if you are an atheist, you like wearing women's clothes, you want to build a wall, stack a court or want to make sure everyone gets free college . . . none of these things will get the same result as imitating the lifestyle of a rabbi two thousand years ago.  

I know, I know - we are too smart for that . . . that whole Christian thing is so long gone.

Then why are we so unsettled?

You already have the power needed to change the world - it starts with you.  

Just a Reminder of How To Make The Most of This Great Season of Politics.

 . . . with the election season in full swing, I figured this was good to post . . .

The Good Neighbor Guide to Discussing Politics Online and Face-to-Face.

We are just one month away from the Presidential Election . . . and we are so excited!  Everyone is just in love with these two candidates we have!  So before we get too excited and possibly go overboard with our interactions with each other, here are a few guidelines that can help us remain good neighbors with each other . . .

1.  It is good to remember that hate is a word that we save for people who murder.  It does not apply to people who disagree with us.  So it is entirely wrong to assume that someone who disagrees with us has hate in their heart.  Actually it has nothing to do with their heart - it is called an idea and it is located in the brain.  Just because it is different doesn't mean it is wrong.

2.  Speaking of ideas,  everyone has them.  Just because yours are different does not mean that other people are idiots.  Even idiots have ideas.  In fact, idiocy thrives when we shut down other people's thoughts.  So we want to do everything we can to provide a safe environment for people to share ideas - even weak ones - because sharing ideas helps us strengthen the good ones and get rid of the bad ones.  Good relationships lead to good ideas.  Bad relationships shut down sharing and cause people to drown in their own bad ideas.

3.  Speaking of sharing, we seem to have lost the art of conversation.  A conversation is a dialogue between two people.  It is never one-sided and it usually involves two people discovering something together through sincere questions.  This means listening (more on this later) and learning from each other.  The word conversation comes from an old Latin term meaning 'to live with.'  Imagine having all your conversations in such a way that you have to live with this person after the conversation is over.  Dropping the mic is so last year.  Conversation and 'de-friending' are contrary terms.

4.  When you want to start a conversation, seek people that are different than you.  It makes for a very interesting dialogue.  Ask them questions with the intention of learning from them.  This doesn't mean you have to agree, but it does mean that you have to listen.  This way you either strengthen your current ideas or you discard the ones that are weak.

5.  When you enter into conversations, try to make it a rule to listen more than you talk.  The Bible is clear: Be quick to listen and slow to anger.  You will not learn anything new when you are the one speaking.  Even if it is something that you completely disagree with, make a pact with your mouth that it just stays shut.  Ask probing and reflective questions: "so what you are saying is . . ." or "I think your point is . . ." The key is humility - every conversation is an opportunity to learn, not win an argument.

6.  Which brings us to arguments.  An argument is not a fight.  An argument is a noun - it is and idea formulated in your head about an issue.  In fourth grade I had an excellent argument for not doing homework, but I never used it as a weapon.  I never said to Mrs. Hartman "so basically it is this bigoted, childphobic and oppressive patriarchal homework system that keeps you coming here every day with a twisted smile on your face, isn't it?"  I would have been spanked.  

7.  Which really brings us to the point of conversations.  Conversations are not contests.  When you realize that you can learn from every encounter, conversations become adventures.  Imagine yourself as a raider of other people's intellect.  Some have great treasures and others, not so much.  But you will always benefit from a conversation if you consider it as a plundering opportunity.  "I am going to learn as much as I can from this person" is how successful conversations take place.  You grow smarter when you listen.

8.  Which brings us to manners.  When you are talking about something that is sensitive, be sensitive.  For example: "Well, maybe the girl who got shot shouldn't have been selling drugs.  I've never seen anyone get shot doing homework at his kitchen table" shows horrible manners.  When in doubt, ask questions.  Maybe, "So what is the story on this young woman?" Or how about, "Maybe I am missing the point, but it seems like a lot of this happens around violent activities - how can we work on getting young people out of this kind of violence?"

9.  Over-communicate your kindness.  Since face-to-face enables people to hear your tone and read your face, you have to go extra with your online postings.  In our culture we need people who reach, not preach.  So instead of, "Donald Trump is gross and people who vote for him are gross" maybe something more like "Help me understand the attraction to people like Donald Trump.  Obviously people like him for some reason - what are your reasons?"

10.  When you disagree, start with the assumption that maybe you don't understand something.  This is a golden rule.  It applies to every conversation: Teachers, Spouses, Friends, the Police.  Instead of, "guns don't kill people, people kill people" how about, "so I don't know that much about the statistics, but would violent crime really go down if we got rid of guns?  Wouldn't criminals still find ways to hurt people?"

It really all comes down to a few of assumptions.  You can learn from everyone.  You can be kind to everyone.  You can change the culture.  You don't like what you see online?  Change it.  Be the person who starts your next conversation with, "I know they tell us we can't get along and have different ideas, but I don't think that is true . . . tell me what you think is in those 30,000 emails."

It's a start.

Where is your spine? Seriously?!

Ladies and Gentlemen . . .

Allow me to let you in on something:
Whether you vote for Trump or Clinton, the future of America is not at stake.  Really.  Some of my Hillary-supporter friends are scared to death that we are about to vote in Hitler.  Some of my Trump-supporter friends are scared to death we are about to vote in Stalin.

To my friends who are Hillary Supporters:

Have you lost your mind?  

Statistically, most of you are supporting her because you think Trump is Hitler.  Have you forgotten that our founders wisely introduced the separation of powers?  That means that whoever the president is, they are not driving the country.  They are sitting in the front seat, yes, but they don't control the gas pedal (Congress) and they don't have control of the steering wheel (Supreme Court).   So no madman that was slick enough to win the presidency could do any lasting damage.

And the Hitler thing.  Let me get my bull horn:

Donald Trump is not very smart.

Hitler was a voracious reader - devouring about a book every day.  He had a weird but studied fascination with history.  He wrote a 900 page autobiography and had an obsession with the occult.  His evil was studied.

On the other hand . . .

Trump doesn't read.  He even said so much.  He makes decisions "with very little knowledge other than the knowledge I had." (1)  His intellectual accomplishments include sparring verbally with Rosie O'Donnell and fat-shaming a beauty pageant winner.  He is a purveyor of ignorance, not evil.

To quote Andy Stanley: "stop scaring the kids . . ." in America we have impeachment.

So vote for Hillary but stop thinking we are all doomed unless we do.  It's nonsense.

To my friends who are Trump Supporters:

Have you lost your faith?

Statistically, you support Trump because you are afraid of Hillary.  More specifically you are scared that Hillary will stack the Supreme Court with Godless Justices who can't wait to turn this country into an atheistic den of sin.

Deep breath, people.  The future of the country is not at stake.

Think about what you are saying.  You are saying that God is crossing His fingers that you vote for the right person so America can continue to exist.  My goodness - get over yourself and stop being such a jellyfish on this subject.

Since when does our faith and the future of our country come from a voting booth?  Have you even heard of the idea of sovereignty?

Even better question:

Since when does God's will become contingent on voting for an ill-tempered, un-studied, spiritually disinterested, self-absorbed man?  Yes, I know that describes most presidents, but seriously - when has God wrung His hands hoping that His man wins?  Is God really that small that he is depending on your vote?

And since when have believers become so weak?

Make the right decision regardless of the consequences.  If you think Trump is a great leader then vote for him.  End of story.  If you don't, stop whining about what might happen as if you are in control of it with your vote.  You're not.

You are not in control of the future of the Supreme Court.  That is God's business.  Your job is to do the right thing.  And the last time I checked, nothing good in my life happened when I partnered with someone who was ill-tempered and self-absorbed.

And even if we turned into a Godless state over the next four years, it seems to me that Christianity thrives the best when we are persecuted.  Shortly after Jesus' death it was a crime to follow Jesus and it went from dozens to thousands in a single day.  Best growth strategy for the church we have ever seen.  Why are we so scared of something so insignificant.  Where is your faith?  Do the right thing.  Make the right choice without respect to contingencies.  Enough with these memes and articles that tell us to compromise so that we can manipulate the future.

So go right now and grab someone who falls into these camps.  Take them by the shoulders and shake them.  Tell them, "do what you think is right and stop worrying about the consequences!"

It's called being true to yourself.

In the twilight . . .

A moment in time . . .

My daughter's name is Kylie.  At 11 years old she is all legs, laughter, hugs and constant activity.  One moment she is at the dinner table and in the next moment she is dancing in the family room.  Her room is never clean and her brain is in a constant state of activity.  It's a glorious mess.

Spending a day together at the shore, we rode bikes on the boardwalk in the morning.  After some lunch at the house we went to the beach.  We rented a paddle board.  For dinner we ate hoagies on the beach.

Back at the house as evening crept in, I did my crossword on the porch as she took a short nap.  Not down for long,  she leaned opened the door to the porch and asked me if I wanted to play diner.

I knew we should have been leaving because we still had ride tickets to spend on the boardwalk.   But how could I resist playing diner on such a special day - just my daughter and I?  She came out in an apron and put a menu she had just created in front of me.  I pretended to be a very discriminating patron of a very fancy restaurant.  She smiled at my effort and responded in kind.  We played these parts for the next ten minutes.  Then we switched roles.  I was the waiter and she was the lady ordering the finest fare.

I loved it and I hated it.

I loved how we were completely ensconced in enjoying this moment.  It wasn't 'playing.'  We were waiters, we were the elite enjoying Foie Gras and the finest Italian Sorbetto.  I loved how she trusted me to play these parts with her and join her in this make believe.

I hated how as the sun was setting, so too were these moments with her.  I hated the realization that this could be the last time we would do this and really mean it.  I wanted her to stay this young forever.

Now, I really don't want her to be young forever.  Imagining her at thirty years old asking me to play diner is weird.  I want her to grow up and enjoy all that life has to offer.  But in the growing dusk, I just wanted to stay in this place for a very long time - enjoying this moment.

For all the madness of this age, here was a sincere heart sharing her world with me - and that was a gift I will always treasure.

We left the porch shortly afterward and joined the crowded madness of the boardwalk but it didn't erase the bittersweet dance of tender innocence we shared as the sun went down.

Let Him Sit Down

Oh my goodness.

So Colin Kaepernick set the world on fire by not standing up during the National Anthem in an NFL game and then stating:

"I am not going to stand up to show pride in a flag for a country that oppresses black people and people of color . . . To me, this is bigger than football and it would be selfish on my part to look the other way. There are bodies in the street and people getting paid leave and getting away with murder."  1

Lots of reactions to this - including this own coach who said "it's not my right to tell him not to do something."

Coach Kelly - of course it is in your rights to say what he should do.  Just as it is Kaepernick's right to say he doesn't support the flag, it is your right to say the flag is not a racist emblem.  You have the right to remind him that this is the same flag that came up over the hills of Maryland and then Tennessee and Georgia that eventually paved the way for a Constitutional Amendment that ended slavery.  It's not about the flag.  It's about who we are as people.

We don't change things by pulling out - we change things by standing up.  Getting involved.

In fact we all have a right to speak up and say, "look, the guy is a football player - we probably shouldn't take him too seriously."  I mean this is the same guy who got fined by the NFL for racial slurs in 2014.  The same guy who pronounced doom on Houston by Tweeting Houston flooding pictures. 2  Come on, people - let's take his sentiment seriously (we have a lot to work on in our nation) - but you and I can do a better job at leading this country toward change by the simple actions we take on our way to work, in our jobs and the communities we find ourselves in.

So let him sit down. 

The rest of us can live up to the ideals of what this country should stand for (and what our faith should lead us to do).   

What's good for the goose . . .

I would much rather be blogging about something else but I just can't.

There are still blogs running around out there saying that the best thing for a Christian to do in this current election cycle is to vote for Trump.

I really don't care about the politics.  

Vote for whoever you want to vote for.  But please leave 'Christian' out of this - it's awkward.

It's awkward because when our best hope as believers is to vote for someone who resonates so little with following Christ, you really de-value what it means to follow Jesus.  Have we forgotten that our hope is in God, and not in an election?  God does pretty amazing things when believers follow their conscience - not who will be on the Supreme Court.  You can't calculate the odds and pray at the same time.

This election cycle is the kind of stuff that gives great sarcastic ammunition to my skeptic and unbelieving friends.

And it is so well deserved.

Morals used to matter.  In 1998 Bill Clinton was on trial for what he did with Monica Lewinsky.   The entire Southern Baptist Convention said the character of the president is important.  Character is something that is essential to our Commander-in-Chief.

Character was important when Clinton had an inappropriate sexual relationship with an intern and then lied about it.  This was a serious charge.  The president's ethics and morals are important.  In 1998 Jerry Falwell said, "He is no longer worthy to fulfill this office."  (Washington Post)  It was all about the president's character and ethics.

How times have changed . . .  

In 2015, Falwell's son endorsed Trump for president and invited him to speak about "Two Corinthians" at Liberty University's chapel.  Talk about a flip-flop.

Now, I am sure Trump is a nice guy and probably fun to hang around with.  But even Trump has talked about how shady he was in his personal and professional life.  The guy recognizes himself that he is no boy scout.  That matters.

How crazy is it that there are theologians writing blog posts that tell us a candidates character is not as important as the rights that he will safeguard for believers?  (Townhall)  Like Cyrus, God could be using Trump to keep our nation 'Christian.'  How ironic that this kind of theology is exactly what is making our nation less and less like Christ.

Something smells fishy here . . .

If morals mattered then.
If ethics mattered then.
If character mattered then.

It all matters now.

Anything less than that tells the world that our Christian convictions are as thin as the width of a paper ballot.  Follow your conscience and let God take care of the political consequences.  The growth of faith has never depended on who is in office.

You can't get a moral result from an immoral vote.

So I have seen all of the articles that are going around arguing that Christians can vote for Trump and still feel morally justified:

See, here's the problem: Good people all over the United States find themselves in a pickle.  They don't necessarily 'like' Donald Trump as a presidential candidate but they definitely don't like Hillary Clinton.  So they are forced to embrace someone who is really difficult to embrace at times.

(this would have been a good thing to think through during the primary season, but that's none of my business)

So anyway, we find ourselves here - in the uncomfortable spot of having to either vote for Hillary, vote for Trump or vote Gary Johnson (the third party choice right now).  And yes . . . I know a vote for Johnson is a vote for Hillary . . .  keep reading.  The big question is how can a person who claims to follow Jesus vote for a guy who seems to be the antithesis of everything that is associated with Jesus?

And no, I won't argue details about that last statement.  It is just an accepted fact.  No matter how much you like Trump and how much you love Jesus - they are very different people.

But anyhow, in the meantime there are a slew of articles running around that tell me, as a Christian, that voting for Trump is actually a moral choice.

That may or may not be true . . .

A moral choice is something I choose regardless of the outcome.  That is what makes it moral.  I am not swayed by the outcome - the ends do not justify the means.  I am evaluating by decision by ethical, theological and philosophical standards that don't have anything to do with whether it achieves anything in the long run.  It is right because it is right.

Otherwise we are dealing with pragmatism.  Here is what I mean:

Take everything off the table: No Hillary.  No Supreme Court.  No bathroom-gender issues.  No E-mails.

Now I ask you - look at a candidate and ask yourself: "Would I vote for citizen 'x?'"  Are they an informed person who doesn't misspeak often in public?  Do they refrain from lying?  Cheating?  Do they make wise choices in their personal life?  Professional life?  Do people outside their family hold them in high regard?  Have they elevated humanity through their life's work?  Can you honestly say they care more about serving us Americans than they do their own interests?

If you answered no to more than three of those questions and still support this person, you are no longer making a moral decision.

You are making a decision based on pragmatics.  You don't really believe in the person, you just want to defeat the other person.  That is political expediency and it is robbing you of your own morals because you are no longer letting God lead.  Instead you are stacking the deck and working on your own behalf because there is no moral force of the universe that will have your back if you don't compromise on what you know to be true.

That is false.  And there are literally thousands of pages of scripture that tell you God is in control and your vote should be pinned to a moral compass that has nothing to do with whether or not your side wins.  The only thing immoral here is your belief that you can't vote on your morals.  You won't get a moral result from an immoral vote.

In the end you become a pawn in a very manipulative game of politics.

Don't do it.  Stay true to what you know is true.  And don't let slick arguments tell you anything else.